Advice about advising

When I found out that I was expecting a baby, news spread fast among friends and family. I started getting the congratulatory phone calls and after a few niceties, the conversation would invariably turn to a barrage of advices. I got advice from family, friends, friends of friends, friends of friends of friends, and strangers whom I had never met before and never met again in my life!

Days flew by and I was a new mom, trying desperately to figure out her way into a newborn’s world. Few months later, I had seen several spit-ups, hundreds of sleepless nights, and thousands of dirty diapers! That’s when I found out that my friend was expecting…you know the first thing I did – called her with a barrage of advices! Unknowingly, the ‘sufferer’ had become the ‘sufferee’ (is that a word?).

What is it about advising? Is it like a “pass it on” phenomenon…you get hammered with advice, so you pass it on? I think there’s more to it. As parents, we go through such a mental and physical roller coaster ride… when someone else is about to take on this journey, we probably just want to make their ride smoother…ease out those bumps if not avoid them.

My advice about advising? PASS IT ON…you do risk getting on your friend’s nerves, but then there’s also the possibility of helping them…its worth the risk!

I want my BLUE SHIRT!

Nowadays, my toddler has started getting a special affection towards certain clothes, like, a particular t-shirt or a pair of jeans with stars on it. She wears them day in and day out until they get so faded that it’s almost impossible to guess the original color. If they get dirty and I throw them into the laundry basket, she will still manage to find them from the bottom of the pile.

One day, we were getting ready to go to someone’s place for a party or something. There began our “negotiations” about clothes. Try as I might, I was not able to convince my daughter to wear the pretty pink princess dress. My options were to give the party a skip or give in to my daughter’s selection of clothes. She finally wore a faded shirt that once was probably blue, a stained pair of jeans, purple socks inside pink shoes, and accessorized with green earrings. Shockingly, she carried it off quite nicely…it was probably because of the wide grin on her face!

I kept convincing myself that someday, she will hopefully develop a better sense of clothing and then it struck me…. Few years down the line, she’ll probably be wearing the perfect outfit with matching shoes, a fashionable purse and so on. But at that time, she won’t feel the need to hold my hand!

I guess I should just let her be… and enjoy these “colorful” times!