I probably give a few hundred instructions to my toddler everyday. Get up, brush your teeth, eat properly, wear your clothes, don’t shout, say thank you… the list is endless! Of course if she makes a mess or does something wrong, then she gets a hamper full of scolding and instructions on how not to repeat it again.
Few days back, as I was hurriedly trying to finish off making dinner, I spilled some beans all over the kitchen floor. Silently cursing myself, I was contemplating whether to put off the cleanup for a later time. But they say, ‘As you sow, so shall you reap’. Looking at the spilled beans my daughter went off on a scolding spree…telling me how it was wrong to spill and how I should cleanup immediately! She was a total reflection of me…when I am upset with her!
Funny as it was, the incident was an eye opener for me. Spills and making mess, although frustrating for us are probably the most fun for toddlers. I mean, how can we expect the tiny hands to be as dexterous as an adult? Sometimes, gravity which is so obvious to us can be intriguing for toddlers. Sometimes, the sole purpose is seeking attention while at others it is a way of expressing distress.
Long story short, from that day onwards…spills were never the same at our home!
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Advice about advising
When I found out that I was expecting a baby, news spread fast among friends and family. I started getting the congratulatory phone calls and after a few niceties, the conversation would invariably turn to a barrage of advices. I got advice from family, friends, friends of friends, friends of friends of friends, and strangers whom I had never met before and never met again in my life!
Days flew by and I was a new mom, trying desperately to figure out her way into a newborn’s world. Few months later, I had seen several spit-ups, hundreds of sleepless nights, and thousands of dirty diapers! That’s when I found out that my friend was expecting…you know the first thing I did – called her with a barrage of advices! Unknowingly, the ‘sufferer’ had become the ‘sufferee’ (is that a word?).
What is it about advising? Is it like a “pass it on” phenomenon…you get hammered with advice, so you pass it on? I think there’s more to it. As parents, we go through such a mental and physical roller coaster ride… when someone else is about to take on this journey, we probably just want to make their ride smoother…ease out those bumps if not avoid them.
My advice about advising? PASS IT ON…you do risk getting on your friend’s nerves, but then there’s also the possibility of helping them…its worth the risk!
Days flew by and I was a new mom, trying desperately to figure out her way into a newborn’s world. Few months later, I had seen several spit-ups, hundreds of sleepless nights, and thousands of dirty diapers! That’s when I found out that my friend was expecting…you know the first thing I did – called her with a barrage of advices! Unknowingly, the ‘sufferer’ had become the ‘sufferee’ (is that a word?).
What is it about advising? Is it like a “pass it on” phenomenon…you get hammered with advice, so you pass it on? I think there’s more to it. As parents, we go through such a mental and physical roller coaster ride… when someone else is about to take on this journey, we probably just want to make their ride smoother…ease out those bumps if not avoid them.
My advice about advising? PASS IT ON…you do risk getting on your friend’s nerves, but then there’s also the possibility of helping them…its worth the risk!
Saturday, July 10, 2010
I want my BLUE SHIRT!
Nowadays, my toddler has started getting a special affection towards certain clothes, like, a particular t-shirt or a pair of jeans with stars on it. She wears them day in and day out until they get so faded that it’s almost impossible to guess the original color. If they get dirty and I throw them into the laundry basket, she will still manage to find them from the bottom of the pile.
One day, we were getting ready to go to someone’s place for a party or something. There began our “negotiations” about clothes. Try as I might, I was not able to convince my daughter to wear the pretty pink princess dress. My options were to give the party a skip or give in to my daughter’s selection of clothes. She finally wore a faded shirt that once was probably blue, a stained pair of jeans, purple socks inside pink shoes, and accessorized with green earrings. Shockingly, she carried it off quite nicely…it was probably because of the wide grin on her face!
I kept convincing myself that someday, she will hopefully develop a better sense of clothing and then it struck me…. Few years down the line, she’ll probably be wearing the perfect outfit with matching shoes, a fashionable purse and so on. But at that time, she won’t feel the need to hold my hand!
I guess I should just let her be… and enjoy these “colorful” times!
One day, we were getting ready to go to someone’s place for a party or something. There began our “negotiations” about clothes. Try as I might, I was not able to convince my daughter to wear the pretty pink princess dress. My options were to give the party a skip or give in to my daughter’s selection of clothes. She finally wore a faded shirt that once was probably blue, a stained pair of jeans, purple socks inside pink shoes, and accessorized with green earrings. Shockingly, she carried it off quite nicely…it was probably because of the wide grin on her face!
I kept convincing myself that someday, she will hopefully develop a better sense of clothing and then it struck me…. Few years down the line, she’ll probably be wearing the perfect outfit with matching shoes, a fashionable purse and so on. But at that time, she won’t feel the need to hold my hand!
I guess I should just let her be… and enjoy these “colorful” times!
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Bribing...I mean rewarding
As toddlers develop their thinking ability, they also start developing a mind of their own. If you decide to take them outside, they want to play at home; if you pick out a red shirt, they’ll want to wear a blue one; if you make pasta for dinner, they will want to eat pizza. And then there are those times when they cannot make up their minds and will make you re-heat and cool down the milk 10 times before it reaches the perfect temperature.
Few days back, on the edge of craziness…I was trying to handle one such “situation.” I was desperately trying to keep my cool and steer away from yelling or scolding. And then, it came out of my mouth – “If you do as I say, I’ll give you a sticker.” Needless to say, it worked! But, a question popped in my mind – “Did I just bribe my daughter?”
Every time a toddler uses the word “NO”, he’s probably trying to assert his independence or hoping to see the familiar reaction from his parent. When my daughter refuses to do something, she gets a strong reaction from me, exactly what she’s looking for – ATTENTION. If you really think about it, in this tender age, all that kids need is attention.
As the concept of logic develops in those little minds, they still need some help from us. And if it is for their own good, a little “rewarding” (as I would like to call it) might be the way to go.
Few days back, on the edge of craziness…I was trying to handle one such “situation.” I was desperately trying to keep my cool and steer away from yelling or scolding. And then, it came out of my mouth – “If you do as I say, I’ll give you a sticker.” Needless to say, it worked! But, a question popped in my mind – “Did I just bribe my daughter?”
Every time a toddler uses the word “NO”, he’s probably trying to assert his independence or hoping to see the familiar reaction from his parent. When my daughter refuses to do something, she gets a strong reaction from me, exactly what she’s looking for – ATTENTION. If you really think about it, in this tender age, all that kids need is attention.
As the concept of logic develops in those little minds, they still need some help from us. And if it is for their own good, a little “rewarding” (as I would like to call it) might be the way to go.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Who does your kid look like?
I have heard at least a few hundred times – “You daughter looks just like you”. Ironically, not as many, but several times I have also heard – “Your daughter looks just like your husband!” My husband and I don’t really look alike and yet I fail to understand how my daughter can look “exactly” like both of us!
And it doesn’t stop there… people have found my daughter to have resemblance to her grandmother, her other grandmother, her uncle… pretty much everyone in the immediate family circle. However, the best remark I have heard so far - her forehead is like her father’s forehead, she has her mother’s eyes, and her chin is like her grandmother!
Why do people have this incessant urge to establish a child’s resemblance to one of the family members? Although, I must confess, I am equally crazy in that department. At times, I have been actually frustrated for not being able to figure out whether a kid looks more like his mother or father! As my husband argues, it doesn’t really matter who the child looks like and he will probably end up looking very different as an adult.
Maybe its just one of our quirks… or maybe, when a new baby is born, we try to find familiar traits to connect with his unfamiliar world!
And it doesn’t stop there… people have found my daughter to have resemblance to her grandmother, her other grandmother, her uncle… pretty much everyone in the immediate family circle. However, the best remark I have heard so far - her forehead is like her father’s forehead, she has her mother’s eyes, and her chin is like her grandmother!
Why do people have this incessant urge to establish a child’s resemblance to one of the family members? Although, I must confess, I am equally crazy in that department. At times, I have been actually frustrated for not being able to figure out whether a kid looks more like his mother or father! As my husband argues, it doesn’t really matter who the child looks like and he will probably end up looking very different as an adult.
Maybe its just one of our quirks… or maybe, when a new baby is born, we try to find familiar traits to connect with his unfamiliar world!
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Maternal Instinct
I have noticed that mothers tend to get quite competitive about their children…sometimes even offended if they see other children doing better.
I had a very interesting experience when I was traveling with my daughter on an international flight few months back. There were three other kids of varying ages, shapes and sizes…all standing with their moms ready to board the flight. Each mom (including me) was looking after their own child secretly dreading the journey and thinking “I wish they could transpond me like they do in Star Trek and save me from this eternal flight journey.” And yet, outwardly every mom was as composed as ever, with an air of – “My child is so much better behaved than yours!” And then it happened….
One of the kids started throwing up pretty violently. My first instinct was to help the kid and his mom. I started searching my purse for wipes, tissues and all sorts of things that I thought would be helpful and so did the other moms. I am not exaggerating when I say - as if it was a pre-planned strategic operation, we four strangers worked together and took care of the situation within minutes.
No matter how much we want our kids to be better than their peers (secretly or otherwise), the “maternal instinct” is so strong… when the time comes, it doesn’t really matter who the child is!
I had a very interesting experience when I was traveling with my daughter on an international flight few months back. There were three other kids of varying ages, shapes and sizes…all standing with their moms ready to board the flight. Each mom (including me) was looking after their own child secretly dreading the journey and thinking “I wish they could transpond me like they do in Star Trek and save me from this eternal flight journey.” And yet, outwardly every mom was as composed as ever, with an air of – “My child is so much better behaved than yours!” And then it happened….
One of the kids started throwing up pretty violently. My first instinct was to help the kid and his mom. I started searching my purse for wipes, tissues and all sorts of things that I thought would be helpful and so did the other moms. I am not exaggerating when I say - as if it was a pre-planned strategic operation, we four strangers worked together and took care of the situation within minutes.
No matter how much we want our kids to be better than their peers (secretly or otherwise), the “maternal instinct” is so strong… when the time comes, it doesn’t really matter who the child is!
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Happy Father's Day!
When a baby is born, he depends entirely on his mother for survival. Of course, medical advances and the invention of “baby formula” have changed this. But usually it’s the mother who provides the basic necessities to a newborn. During this time, the father is expected to do “other things”. This “other things” category is quite broad… it includes diaper duty, burping the baby after feeding, putting the baby to sleep, laundry, dishes, cleaning, taking phone calls, dealing with medical bills, fighting with insurance companies….not to mention taking care of a postpartum wife whose hormones have driven her to “loony town”. Everybody calls in to check how the baby and the mother are doing…nobody ever asks about the father, poor soul.
Fatherhood…that’s how it starts! His sweet slumber is interrupted by a crying baby needing diaper change, he misses his most crucial football game on TV because his daughter wants “Daddy” to put her to bed, he starts watching his mouth lest his son might pick up some of those words, he stays up all night making sure his daughter’s fever is not rising, he skips happy hour because he simply cannot miss his son’s first performance. Everyday as he comes home from work, his kid’s face lights up like never before…..
Lets a take a moment to commend their “behind the scenes” work & wish a Happy Father’s day to all the Dads!
Fatherhood…that’s how it starts! His sweet slumber is interrupted by a crying baby needing diaper change, he misses his most crucial football game on TV because his daughter wants “Daddy” to put her to bed, he starts watching his mouth lest his son might pick up some of those words, he stays up all night making sure his daughter’s fever is not rising, he skips happy hour because he simply cannot miss his son’s first performance. Everyday as he comes home from work, his kid’s face lights up like never before…..
Lets a take a moment to commend their “behind the scenes” work & wish a Happy Father’s day to all the Dads!
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Let go...mommy
The very first day of school is difficult for all kids, but probably even more for the parents. You drop off your kid at school, which in some cases literally has to be “drop off” as your kid tries to hold on to your pants until you think they might come off….yelling “Mommy Mommy” in the last attempt that you might change your mind and take her home… But when she realizes that mommy is really “dumping” me in this strange place, with these strange people, slowly but surely the tears start rolling down those cheeks. It just breaks your heart….
But you persist, you bear the tears, shed some of your own and the day finally comes. As you are about to drop off your kid at school and are getting ready to let go of her hand, she sees those familiar faces, pulls herself away and runs towards her friends without even looking back to check if you have left. It doesn’t just break your heart….it shatters into a million pieces! And yet, you come away with a smile and a sense of accomplishment!
But you persist, you bear the tears, shed some of your own and the day finally comes. As you are about to drop off your kid at school and are getting ready to let go of her hand, she sees those familiar faces, pulls herself away and runs towards her friends without even looking back to check if you have left. It doesn’t just break your heart….it shatters into a million pieces! And yet, you come away with a smile and a sense of accomplishment!
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Life and Death
I was showing my 2-year old daughter, videos of her grandparents who are in India. She thoroughly enjoyed them along with my commentary about the fun times we had. And then out of nowhere, she asked me the most unexpected question: “Where is your grandfather, mommy?” He passed away few years back and I have always talked fondly about him. But as I was bracing to answer my daughter’s question, I suddenly had no answer. Should I introduce the word “death” to her and thus open up a range of unanswerable questions? And even if I did, will she even understand the concept?
How do you explain death to a 2-year old? Just as…how do you explain birth? Looking at our wedding photos, I have heard this question few times: “Mommy, why am I not in your wedding photos?” or “Why did you not bring me to your wedding?” I have just laughed at and dismissed those questions just as I dismissed the question about my grandfather by saying – he’s not there anymore. But sooner or later, I will have tell the truth…maybe partially if not entirely.
I realized it is at times like these that we might start introducing the concept of “God” – its so much easier to say, “He went to God’s home” and “God makes babies”!
How do you explain death to a 2-year old? Just as…how do you explain birth? Looking at our wedding photos, I have heard this question few times: “Mommy, why am I not in your wedding photos?” or “Why did you not bring me to your wedding?” I have just laughed at and dismissed those questions just as I dismissed the question about my grandfather by saying – he’s not there anymore. But sooner or later, I will have tell the truth…maybe partially if not entirely.
I realized it is at times like these that we might start introducing the concept of “God” – its so much easier to say, “He went to God’s home” and “God makes babies”!
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Baby Proofing
My mom always argues – “Young parents of today (which includes me) are way too protective of their kids…we never even heard of baby-proofing and yet our kids turned out fine!”
When my daughter first started moving around, trying to poke her teeny fingers into electrical outlets, I panicked and bought a store full of baby proofing items. However, I wonder if it is right to protect our kids from every little hazard. I mean closing electrical outlets is absolutely necessary, but is it essential to cover each and every sharp edge in your house? If a kid’s elbow never hits a sharp edge, how will she know what a sharp edge is?
I have to confess that at times I am critical of over-protective parents but having thought it over… probably over-protectiveness comes from a parent’s past experience or their extra knowledge about the hazard.
I guess it’s up to every parent to decide the amount of baby proofing their home needs…. as every child is different, so is every parent.
When my daughter first started moving around, trying to poke her teeny fingers into electrical outlets, I panicked and bought a store full of baby proofing items. However, I wonder if it is right to protect our kids from every little hazard. I mean closing electrical outlets is absolutely necessary, but is it essential to cover each and every sharp edge in your house? If a kid’s elbow never hits a sharp edge, how will she know what a sharp edge is?
I have to confess that at times I am critical of over-protective parents but having thought it over… probably over-protectiveness comes from a parent’s past experience or their extra knowledge about the hazard.
I guess it’s up to every parent to decide the amount of baby proofing their home needs…. as every child is different, so is every parent.
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Hello, Namaste, and Hola!
My husband and I talk in Marathi (our mother tongue) and are teaching it as the primary language to our 2-year old. We try to limit speaking in English at home as we were told by our experienced friends that kids eventually learn English in school and tend to forget their mother tongue.
Now that my daughter is starting to have more and more contact with the “outside world”, she seems to be picking up English quite fast. And then she has some Hindi-speaking friends who try to talk to communicate with her in Hindi. And of course being recently introduced to the world of “Dora the Explorer”, she has gotten to know some Spanish words.
It is one thing that my daughter is picking up all the 4 languages in her own ways, I am more surprised by the fact that at home she speaks Marathi, with American friends she tries to speak English and with Hindi friends she makes it a point to use the 2 or 3 Hindi words that she knows…relevant or not!
Now “Dora” provides relief for me when I have work to do and I put on the videos for my daughter, but also is mostly the reason for her tantrums because I don’t let her watch it too often…so lets not go there!
They say that languages evolve with time. In the diverse environment that we live, that our kids will grow in…it will be interesting to see today’s languages evolve!
Now that my daughter is starting to have more and more contact with the “outside world”, she seems to be picking up English quite fast. And then she has some Hindi-speaking friends who try to talk to communicate with her in Hindi. And of course being recently introduced to the world of “Dora the Explorer”, she has gotten to know some Spanish words.
It is one thing that my daughter is picking up all the 4 languages in her own ways, I am more surprised by the fact that at home she speaks Marathi, with American friends she tries to speak English and with Hindi friends she makes it a point to use the 2 or 3 Hindi words that she knows…relevant or not!
Now “Dora” provides relief for me when I have work to do and I put on the videos for my daughter, but also is mostly the reason for her tantrums because I don’t let her watch it too often…so lets not go there!
They say that languages evolve with time. In the diverse environment that we live, that our kids will grow in…it will be interesting to see today’s languages evolve!
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Grow up...just not too fast!
Few days back, someone asked my husband and me – “How old is your kid?” Both of us answered at the same time. I said 2 and ½ years while he said 2 years. Her exact age then was 2 years and 3 months. Subconsciously, I had chosen to round up her age to the higher denomination, while my husband, to the lower one.
As parents we try to teach our kids, new things right from birth. I keep hearing new mothers saying – “I just can’t wait until my son starts walking!” or “My daughter is really trying to talk… I am so eager to hear her first word.” But, when they finally do start walking, we think the crawling phase was so much easier. Just as the times when my daughter is bombarding philosophical questions at me from her car seat and I am trying to figure out those really confusing directions to a friend’s house, I wonder… why was I getting so impatient for her to start talking?
As my daughter learns new skills, I marvel and rejoice but secretly I miss her being a baby. I guess we want our kids to grow up and become good human beings… just not so fast!
As parents we try to teach our kids, new things right from birth. I keep hearing new mothers saying – “I just can’t wait until my son starts walking!” or “My daughter is really trying to talk… I am so eager to hear her first word.” But, when they finally do start walking, we think the crawling phase was so much easier. Just as the times when my daughter is bombarding philosophical questions at me from her car seat and I am trying to figure out those really confusing directions to a friend’s house, I wonder… why was I getting so impatient for her to start talking?
As my daughter learns new skills, I marvel and rejoice but secretly I miss her being a baby. I guess we want our kids to grow up and become good human beings… just not so fast!
Monday, May 24, 2010
For the umpteenth time...
I can watch a movie once, twice, if I really like it even three of four times. Yesterday, as I put my daughter to bed, we started the daily night time routine. As expected I heard for the umpteenth time, “I want to hear the Goodnight moon story.” I have tried everything from hiding the book, introducing a new book, telling a different story… no matter what, our day has to end with the Goodnight moon story.
Really, what is it with kids and reading the same story over and over? It’s not that I did not want to read that book to her, it’s a great book. I just felt like it might be good to introduce some new concepts and bring in some variety.
Yesterday, I decided to experiment! I opened the book and started constructing a new story from the pictures. She listened to every word I said…though with a question mark on her face. After making up something about the last page, I closed the book with a feeling of achievement and silent triumph. As I was reaching for the light switch, there came the words, “OK now I want to hear the REAL goodnight moon story!”
Really, what is it with kids and reading the same story over and over? It’s not that I did not want to read that book to her, it’s a great book. I just felt like it might be good to introduce some new concepts and bring in some variety.
Yesterday, I decided to experiment! I opened the book and started constructing a new story from the pictures. She listened to every word I said…though with a question mark on her face. After making up something about the last page, I closed the book with a feeling of achievement and silent triumph. As I was reaching for the light switch, there came the words, “OK now I want to hear the REAL goodnight moon story!”
Thursday, May 20, 2010
But Why...?
My daughter asked me her first question when she was little less than 2 years old. As I hung up the phone, she said “Who had just called?” My mouth was wide open with disbelief that I had just heard a question from this tiny little person who not very long ago was just going “gagagagaga”! That’s when it all started… ‘who’, ‘when’, ‘how’, ‘where’ and the dreaded one of all “WHY?”
Yesterday, as we sat down for dinner, she pointed to a tiny piece of cumin (commonly used in Indian cooking) on her plate and asked what it was. As I explained, the more important question came up – Mommy, WHY DID YOU PUT IT? You know… until that moment I had never really thought about it. The real answer was – “That’s how my mom taught me to cook and I blindly followed it!” But how can you explain this to a 2 year old?
It’s probably not too long until I say, “Because, that’s just how it is!” But I am not ready to give in just yet. So, I answered – “Its good for your health and it makes you strong.” Thankfully, that ended the discussion…the next thing I did was google “cumin” and find out that it helps with digestion!
It’s funny…as we grow older, we start taking small things for granted. But when a child questions every insignificant thing, it makes you wonder... and maybe relive your childhood in a small way!
Yesterday, as we sat down for dinner, she pointed to a tiny piece of cumin (commonly used in Indian cooking) on her plate and asked what it was. As I explained, the more important question came up – Mommy, WHY DID YOU PUT IT? You know… until that moment I had never really thought about it. The real answer was – “That’s how my mom taught me to cook and I blindly followed it!” But how can you explain this to a 2 year old?
It’s probably not too long until I say, “Because, that’s just how it is!” But I am not ready to give in just yet. So, I answered – “Its good for your health and it makes you strong.” Thankfully, that ended the discussion…the next thing I did was google “cumin” and find out that it helps with digestion!
It’s funny…as we grow older, we start taking small things for granted. But when a child questions every insignificant thing, it makes you wonder... and maybe relive your childhood in a small way!
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
To push or not to push...
Yesterday, my daughter had her first brush with “bullying”. She was playing in the park and two boys started pushing her around. I was standing few feet away, but to even my surprise… I did not do anything. I guess I wanted her to figure out a way for herself. However, my daughter being the easygoing type…kept going back to make friends with the boys and they kept pushing her. Finally, after trying 4-5 times, she came running to me with a question mark on her face.
At that moment it struck me…I DID NOT KNOW WHAT TO TELL HER! Do I tell her to push them back and basically teach her – Be rude to others when they are rude to you? Certainly not! Do I tell her to just walk away and thus not fight the injustice? Do I tell her to just say, “Please don’t do it” and possibly ask for more trouble?
I never imagined that such a simple, harmless incident would leave me in such a clueless state! Yes, it wasn’t a big deal… I mean c’mon they were cute little boys, just being silly!
I just hope the next time she runs up to me with a question mark on her face… I have an answer.
-Blogger13
At that moment it struck me…I DID NOT KNOW WHAT TO TELL HER! Do I tell her to push them back and basically teach her – Be rude to others when they are rude to you? Certainly not! Do I tell her to just walk away and thus not fight the injustice? Do I tell her to just say, “Please don’t do it” and possibly ask for more trouble?
I never imagined that such a simple, harmless incident would leave me in such a clueless state! Yes, it wasn’t a big deal… I mean c’mon they were cute little boys, just being silly!
I just hope the next time she runs up to me with a question mark on her face… I have an answer.
-Blogger13
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Grocery Store Trip
There was a time when I would take a leisurely stroll through the grocery store having nothing else better to do…now I have plan not just for the time spent there, but also for the unexpected expenses!
One day I was standing at the checkout counter of a grocery store, just having rushed through the aisles, grabbing the essential grocery before my toddler runs out of patience. All my items were lined up at the checkout counter. To save time, I even had my credit card out and ready to swipe, when… my toddler said “Mommy can I have that red thing over there?” It was a chewing gum and there was no way I could have given it to her, so I said a firm no. Its enough to say…her reaction that followed this “no”, started getting me the glares from people around. I had two choices – leave all the grocery and my 20 minutes of hard work, and run out of there. Or I could forget that people around me are staring thinking I am the worst parent in the whole wide world and go about my business as if nothing has happened. Fortunately I found a third option – I quickly grabbed a small toy right next to the “red thing” and distracted my toddler by giving it to her. I did not even bother to look at the price… it did not matter.
As the kids grow the expenses are going to grow with them – there’s school, college, camps, the latest gadgets when they become teenagers! But do we fret about it? NO! As much as I was feeling guilty for rewarding my daughter’s grocery store incident with a toy, when we came home and she said, “I love this toy…mommy you are the best!” and gave me a huge smile… I melted! Its moments like these that make life.
I guess, saving money for the future is essential… but not at the cost of today.
-Blogger13
One day I was standing at the checkout counter of a grocery store, just having rushed through the aisles, grabbing the essential grocery before my toddler runs out of patience. All my items were lined up at the checkout counter. To save time, I even had my credit card out and ready to swipe, when… my toddler said “Mommy can I have that red thing over there?” It was a chewing gum and there was no way I could have given it to her, so I said a firm no. Its enough to say…her reaction that followed this “no”, started getting me the glares from people around. I had two choices – leave all the grocery and my 20 minutes of hard work, and run out of there. Or I could forget that people around me are staring thinking I am the worst parent in the whole wide world and go about my business as if nothing has happened. Fortunately I found a third option – I quickly grabbed a small toy right next to the “red thing” and distracted my toddler by giving it to her. I did not even bother to look at the price… it did not matter.
As the kids grow the expenses are going to grow with them – there’s school, college, camps, the latest gadgets when they become teenagers! But do we fret about it? NO! As much as I was feeling guilty for rewarding my daughter’s grocery store incident with a toy, when we came home and she said, “I love this toy…mommy you are the best!” and gave me a huge smile… I melted! Its moments like these that make life.
I guess, saving money for the future is essential… but not at the cost of today.
-Blogger13
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Baby Needs
When I started my first job, I was right out of school and hence, practically broke. My Indian mentality made me save a part of my paycheck in the bank, thus giving up on a lot of fun things which now I realize were possible only while young. My single account became a joint one after marriage. Soon, we were expecting a baby… what we were not expecting were the unexpected expenses that came with the baby. I mean c’mon, babies are these cute little cuddly people who have very basic needs like food, water and few clothes, right? Yeah right!
Even before our baby arrived, I was swarmed with – of course the advice from every other person you meet, but also the list of things I must, repeat must buy before the delivery. I waddled to the baby store, bought all the things on this huge list and thought – “I am finally done shopping for the baby!” Naïve that I was, it was the last time I said that sentence!
However, it wasn’t before I had spent a fortune on baby stuff that I realized - babies really do have very basic needs. Most of the things that we buy for them are mostly for the parents’ comfort.
Yesterday, I bought an expensive toy for my baby - it boasted “intellectual development.” With much fanfare, we opened the box. I started showing her how to play with it. Few minutes passed and I heard her giggles… I was still playing with the toy…she was totally ignoring it, quite content playing with the box and the packing material inside.
The money spent buying the toy was well worth it…my baby thoroughly enjoyed played with the box for days to come!
Even before our baby arrived, I was swarmed with – of course the advice from every other person you meet, but also the list of things I must, repeat must buy before the delivery. I waddled to the baby store, bought all the things on this huge list and thought – “I am finally done shopping for the baby!” Naïve that I was, it was the last time I said that sentence!
However, it wasn’t before I had spent a fortune on baby stuff that I realized - babies really do have very basic needs. Most of the things that we buy for them are mostly for the parents’ comfort.
Yesterday, I bought an expensive toy for my baby - it boasted “intellectual development.” With much fanfare, we opened the box. I started showing her how to play with it. Few minutes passed and I heard her giggles… I was still playing with the toy…she was totally ignoring it, quite content playing with the box and the packing material inside.
The money spent buying the toy was well worth it…my baby thoroughly enjoyed played with the box for days to come!
Saturday, May 15, 2010
My very first blog
Hello everybody,
I know that there are tons of people out there who write tons of blogs. Some are interesting, while others are just passable. I also know that each and every one of us is extremely busy with work, family, studies… basically trying to make something out of our life.
Once I was a decently career-minded person working at a good job. I quit to stay home and raise my kid. Don’t take me wrong… it has been the best decision of my life so far. But sometimes it makes me wonder… is that enough?
I am sure that there are so many stay-at-home moms out there who are running behind their kids all day long, longing for those 5 minutes of break without hearing “MOMMY!”, secretly wishing their kids would nap just 15 more minutes so that they can get something done……all that jazz!
But ask them – if you were to do it all over again, would you put your child in daycare and work 8 hours instead? I am sure most of them would say…NOT A CHANCE! In today’s world when everyone is scrambling to get the best out of life, I believe that being able to stay at home and nurture your child’s life is a privilege that not too many of us get.
So this blog is dedicated to all those ladies out there, doing the most difficult 24-hour, 7 days a week job. You are doing wonderful!
As life passes by us, the fame will fade, the money will drain, what will remain is the people and love around us… the THINGS THAT MATTER!
Blogger13
I know that there are tons of people out there who write tons of blogs. Some are interesting, while others are just passable. I also know that each and every one of us is extremely busy with work, family, studies… basically trying to make something out of our life.
Once I was a decently career-minded person working at a good job. I quit to stay home and raise my kid. Don’t take me wrong… it has been the best decision of my life so far. But sometimes it makes me wonder… is that enough?
I am sure that there are so many stay-at-home moms out there who are running behind their kids all day long, longing for those 5 minutes of break without hearing “MOMMY!”, secretly wishing their kids would nap just 15 more minutes so that they can get something done……all that jazz!
But ask them – if you were to do it all over again, would you put your child in daycare and work 8 hours instead? I am sure most of them would say…NOT A CHANCE! In today’s world when everyone is scrambling to get the best out of life, I believe that being able to stay at home and nurture your child’s life is a privilege that not too many of us get.
So this blog is dedicated to all those ladies out there, doing the most difficult 24-hour, 7 days a week job. You are doing wonderful!
As life passes by us, the fame will fade, the money will drain, what will remain is the people and love around us… the THINGS THAT MATTER!
Blogger13
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